Today I'm really feeling like I need a break. And that makes me feel like a bad mother.
I think it's a side effect of IF - to feel like you worked and wished so hard for these babies, that there must be something wrong with you if you ever wish to be away from them. I'm tired. I've been staying up to late and getting up too early, so I'm not getting enough sleep this week. And they have been taking short naps, so my days are pretty full. And I think they're going through a growth spurt and taking more milk from me - so I'm feeling pretty drained (literally). But it's hard to find time to eat more when they are so busy.
I also feel like I'm not very good at entertaining them. I'm running out of ideas. I think they're bored. We try different toys, music, jumper, bumbo seat, etc. And they get frustrated after a while. I think they really want to be upright more, and be moving around more, and they can't quite do any of that yet. So they get frustrated and bored.
Another terrible mother thought - I think they'll probably have more fun with the nanny. She knows how to play with and entertain babies. I don't really know how.
just one of those days...