a plan

A possible plan, that is. I say "possible", because I reserve the right to cancel at any time. That's the beauty of it.

We are, for the moment, moving forward with a natural FET cycle right away. As in - right now. I went in friday for day 2 monitoring, I starting testing for an LH surge w/ OPKs on day 10 (saturday), and I go for a follicle check ultrasound on day 12 (a week from today). We could potentially be transferring again two weeks from today, if the cycle goes well.

If it all seems a little fast, that's because it is. And that's part of the reason why I am reserving the right to cancel. If I feel like my body or my mind is not ready, then I'll pull the plug. But at least I've got the process going. And the process involves nothing but some monitoring for now, so there's very little physical, emotional or financial investment. It's easy to stop at any time, because there's nothing to be stopped - there are no drugs or hormones for now. A couple days before transfer I'll start a low dose of PIO.

I certainly wouldn't be ready today - I am incredibly drained, physically and emotionally, from the past week. But I think in two weeks I can feel good again. I still intend to have the sit-down with the RE and find out if there is anything we haven't considered that could be causing these FETs to fail. And if she says there is, that some further test might reveal something, then we'll cancel this cycle and do whatever testing we need. But my suspicion is that she will say there is nothing else to be done, it's the luck of the draw, not every embryo makes, etc. And if that's the case, then I'd rather move on sooner than later.

Maybe I'm rushing it. My acupuncturist thinks I am - she would rather see me wait a few months, do a lot of acupuncture, some chinese herbs, etc. But I'm not convinced that these things will make a difference. I just feel like I need to do this to move forward with my life one way or another. If these last two embryos are going to make it, then I want to get there ASAP. If these last two embryos aren't going to make it, then I want to get that over with ASAP.